Sunday 1st February
"Parish Made to wait AGAIN to lift the league cup"
Whiteparish arrived on a cold sunday morning after a night of drinking for some after the birthday of forgotten Whiteparish player Nick Lumber. This resulted in an extremely poor start from the parish. Without Star player Tom Mundy due to injury, Whiteparish struggled to stamp their authority on the game. A slow a sluggish first half led to a 0-0 score at half time. It was clear to see that manager Sean O'Donnell was unhappy to say the least at the teams first half display. It was time for the seasons underachievers to stand up and be counted. Players such as Daniel Lumber, Daniel Barnes, Craig Wallington and Daniel Burchmore. The shouting and screaming from the gaffer seemed to take affect, passes started to find feet, Wallington started to make the intelligent runs that everyone knows he can and David 'Goal a Game' Stacey kept up his average by scoring a stunning 25 yard screamer. One goal led to two with Jim 'I only play home games' Dovey finished smartly from 6 yards after a flowing move from the team. Recovering Alcoholic Craig Wallington took time out of his rehab programme to play, resulting in a great finish past the fat alderbury goal keeper who managed to blame everything on his team when watching the game it was clear to see he was a horrific player. Talking of horrific play, Whiteparish goal keeper Chris Smith clearly didn't fancy a clean sheet by generously allowing alderbury to score in the last few moments of the game. Well done Chris! Whiteparish's next game is West Harnham away in the league. If Whiteparish can go to the hill and get a result, they would clinch the league title and gain promotion to Division 1.
Whiteparish 3 - 1 Alderbury CUP
Sunday 18th January
"Parish Toy and Destroy to progress into the next round of the Cup"
This was a mojor opportunity for Whiteparish to test themselves against a team in the top flight of Salisbury and District football. Whiteparish have already proved to a number of critics that they can not only play pleasing football but also dig deep to come back and get a result. Yet again this was the case as Whiteparish went into the break at 3-1 down. Yet again Whiteparish started slowly, not finding the passes to really trouble the opposition. With Daniel Lumber struggling through the game with what was thought to be a hangover, Whiteparish's defence let the New Inn Strikers walk through the middle and create chance after chance. Things got worse for Whiteparish when a rush of blood to the head from underperfoming Lumber, led to him flying into the oppositions striker with a potential leg breaking challenge on the edge of the box, which swiftly resulted in a penalty kick. New Inn stretched their lead to 2-0. I can't remember what their third goal was like.... proably another Lumber error. Just a single Brendan O'Brien goal gave whiteparish any kind of reward for continued pressure towards the end of the first half. Thankfully at the start of the second half, Lumber had found a new touch after slipping on a pair of different boots. This then rallied the whole team into a second half performance which brought back memories of the 5-3 come back against Victoria Hotel Reserves. All of a sudden players started to come into life. Joe Hope decided to test the fall backs, Stuart Dear on his first start in many, many games looked 20 years younger, Daniel Barnes tried his very hardest to tackle and Daniel Burchmore put more effort into his diving. Charlie Evans was clearing the ball with greater conviction, Craig Wallington was chasing down every ball, hungry for goals, David 'Goal a Game' Stacey failed to score a game and even Chris Smith realised that he could kick the ball straight. All of these pieces fitted together and gave Whiteparish the platform to come back from 3-1 down to win the game 4-3. Goals from Brendan O'Brien (2), Craig Wallington and Charlie Angus Evans helped seal victory. However this wasn't the only news to come out on the 18th of January. At the final whistle, manager Sean O'Donnell revealed why left back Robert Males had failed to show up once again. Good news in some respects that it wasn't due to the failure of his piece of shite BMW to start, he infact spent the night in a police cell. No real reson was given to the players why this was but there are rumours circulating the Whiteparish dressing room that it was due to having had sexual intercourse with a minor. This has heaped pressure onto manager Sean O'Donnell to use his man mangerial skills to try and get Robbert back on track, much the same as he has done in the past with Craig Wallington's Alcohol addiction, Daniel Burchmore's Eating disorder along with his mental state after coming out about his homosexuality and in more recent times with Brendan O'Brien after a string of convictions, most notably for attacking a homeless man.
Whiteparish 4 - 3 New Inn CUP
Sunday the 21st of December
The 'Parish started brightly and James Dovey danced his way past 3 players to set up Dave Stacey for his routine goal a game.
Recovering alcoholic Craig Wallington then got in on the action with a superb left foot finish after beating two players to give the Parish a 2 goal lead at half time.
Three Crowns came out strongly in the second half and managed to hit the post and crossbar in the space of 2 minutes, this only encouraged the Parish to up their level and Wallington scored again with a looping header from a corner.
A mazy run by Joe Hope this time ended in a 3 crowns player putting into his own net. This is the second own goal in as many games for the parish, people say to have success you need luck, Whiteparish have had lady luck by their side on a number of occasions and have benefitted from this by having a fantastic season so far.
James Dovey completed the scoring (after he had earlier missed 2 guilt edged chances) with an excellent finish into the left corner.
This victory means that Whiteparish have won 12 out of 12 this season and are the only team in the Salisbury and District league with a 100% record. This has further put the chairman's (Sir John Stacey) idea of selling the football club to an un-named Russian billionaire to the very back of his mind. With players such as David Stacey, Daniel Burchmore and Daniel Lumber having yet another consistant season between themselves and the likes of Charlie Evans, Joe Hope and Robert Males playing out of their skin for the majority of games and the most notible of contributions from Craig Wallington, Brendan O'Brien and Daniel Barnes has all helped to fire the Parish to the top of the table with only one point needed to win the league. However this list above are names that have been mentioned in almost every match report this season. One name that has been mentioned on only the rarest of occasions is Chris Smith. The opening few games were played without Whiteparish's number one. He was put under pressure from Sam Parker for the much coverted number 1 spot, a string of simply breathtaking displays from the Lion's keeper has seen him keep his place and has managed to keep Whiteparish's goal difference to an impressive tally. However i feel it is appropriate that Stuart Dear, Richard Dacosta, manager Sean O'Donnell, current Sydney F.C player Tim Mundy and our very special home fixture only player, James Dovey must also get mentions for being fantastic squad members and always making themselves avaliable when called upon. After West Harnham lost 6-0 this weekend, Whitepairsh are only 1 single point away from league success. Their run in all cup competitions still continues and manager Sean O'Donnell is confident of claiming more than one piece of silverware this season.
Whiteparish 5 - 0 Three Crowns Harnham
Sunday the 14th of December
After a heavy night out for a few of the Whiteparish star's on Saturday night, Whiteparish started slowly at first with passes going astray. However manager Sean O'Donnell got the message through to all of the players to calm down and to play how he new the Lion's could. Passes soon started to find feet and some fluent football lead to a string of goals. A few players missed out on Sunday, most notably was Right back Daniel Barnes. Daniel has had one of his tougher season's with a string of horrific performances which has led to Sean O'Donnell to drop him down to the bench. There are also whispers that Daniel might be sent out on loan to division 3 side Five Bell's to gain some first team experience. With increasing pressure on the manager to bring in some new faces in January, Daniel is seen as an automatic solution to making space for potential signings. Daniel Burchmore was substituted after only half an hour on Sunday after a raft of errors, including one moment of madness where he tackled team-mate Tom Mundy and passed to the opposition. The England international, 25, was cheered off ironically by home fans - who have since been criticised in phone-ins and Whiteparish forums for turning against their own players. Manager Sean O'Donnell was quick to support his player by saying "I think he will come back and show how good a player he is." "The same fans will applaud him when he does well." Whiteparish left back and local stud Robert Males is under investigation this week after television cameras spotted the England international's spitting act during the second half of Whiteparish's 6-0 win over New Sauram on Sunday. Males could now find himself in trouble with the Football Association. "I deeply regret my actions and wish to publicly apologise." "I have let down my manager, Sean O'Donnell, and team-mates. I am a role model to many thousands of fans throughout the world and my behaviour showed a lack of moral responsibility to the public who support me. I am deeply sorry and embarrassed about the incident." Chairman Sir John Stacey is reported to wanting to fine Robert a month's wages after this act of madness. Scorers on Sunday were Craig Wallington 2, Tom Mundy, David Stacey, Joe Hope and an own goal all contributed with a goal each to secure a 6-0 win, stretching the Lion's lead to 9 points.
Whiteparish 6 - 0 New Sauram
Sunday the 2nd of December
It was a cold, wet sunday morning when the Whiteparish Lion's walked into the changing room's. Whiteparish had a bare 11, however things only got worse after Robert Males turned up at least 20 mintues late in his battered BMW and local thug Brendan O'Brien walked into the changing room's looking like he hadn't washed in years. An explanation soon followed, with Mr O'Brien explaining that he had spent the whole of Saturday sleeping the booze off in a police cell after a horrific fight between himself and a homeless person in the late hours on Friday evening. The homeless man is believed to be a wanted man, who walks the streets of Whiteparish under the name of Robert Harris A.K.A 'smelly rob'. However Brendan showed his resilience, and pulled on the Red and White strips of the mighty parish to play a full 90 minutes of football and contribute to the win with a brace. Whiteparish started characteristically poor, shipping early chances wide of the post on a number of occasions. O'Brien had the measure of Victoria Hotel's Right Back, a man that look suspiciously like he had been found on the side of the streets minutes before kick off. However this early pressure didn't result in a goal, infact the opposite. Victoria Hotel had 3 shots and converted them all. Finally the half time whistle went and a dispondent Whiteparish took this opportunity to make an early substitute, off came Richard Dacosta in his first start of the season, on came player manager Sean O'Donnell to try and sure up the midfield. It didn't take long for this half time change to take a real affect on the game, with Whiteparish totally dominating the second half. However they took their time to score their first goal through Brendan O'Brien, however 1 goal led to 2 and so on, before the score was Whiteparish 5, Victoria Hotel 3. Two goals each from O'Brien and Nick Lumber and a single goal from recovering alcoholic Craig Wallington sealed victory and sent the Red and White army through to the next round of the Stonehenge Cup. Whiteparish's next fixture is set to be a tough game, due to a number of absentees from the squad. Sean O'Donnell has commented that 'Next week's game is irrelevant.' 'We are concentrating on winning the league and also going as far as possible in the Stonehenge Cup.'
Whiteparish 5 - 3 Victoria Hotel Reserves
Sunday the 23rd of November
Whiteparish arrived at the game on sunday morning with nervous feelings deep within their stomach's. This wasn't due to the local derby against fellow Division 2 team Alderbury, but this would in fact be their first game without star player, and local legend Tim Mundy. To further heap the pressure on manager Sean O'Donnell to come away with 3 points, was his decision to drop out of favour Daniel Lumber completely for sunday's game. Despite this Whiteparish had one of their better warm-up's prior to the game, with Captain David Stacey and Robbert Males deciding they didn't need a warm-up, this clearly wasn't the case for Robert who followed a poor warm-up with an equally bad performance on the pitch. Whiteparish started the game the stronger of the two team's, totally dominating possesion. The Lion's continually attacked and were rewarded with several goals in the first half, the most notable of which came from record signing Tom Mundy who picked the ball up on the edge of the area, rounded 2 Alderbury players before firing into the roof of the net. Whiteparish went in at the break 3-0 ahead. Whiteparish started the second half slowly and pressure from Alderbury lead to a number of goals. Most of which came from the left side of Whiteparish's defence, which was particularly poor and may need some attention before next weeks Cup Game. However Whiteparish kept plugging away and replied with a number of goals. David 'Goal a Game' Stacey scored his 6th in 3 games, and Craig Wallington rewarded the gaffer's faith to keep him in the side by claiming a brace. Tom Mundy finished off the game with a superb touch and great finish, after playing a one - two with Nick Lumber, who incidentally decided to show his true colours and pull on the red and white shirt for the first time in too long. When asked his analysis on the game, Sean O'Donnell replied with ' I thought we played some fantastic football in the first half.' 'We managed to soak up the Alderbury pressure and reply with a couple goals to seal the game. I was pleased with most of the players, however there are a few players that may miss out next Sunday.' There has been no secret about Daniel Barnes and his recent performances. The press have used this against him, along with Daniel Burchmore he is the favorite to loose his place for the Stonehenge Cup Competition against Victoria Hotel Reserves.
Whiteparish 6 - 3 Alderbury
Sunday the 16th of November
The Red and White Lion's took their match preparation to another level on saturday, with the whole squad attending a night out in Salisbury. There was a number of casualties throughout the night. However the boys were kept in order with the stone cold soba gaffer keeping an eye on the boys. The Whiteparish manager took this opportunity to rest his star player, Tom Mundy after he struggled in Whiteparish's 9-0 win over Winterslow the previous week with a sore arse hole. Whiteparish started off well, dominating the early possesion they soon found their reward with a miss kick from Dan Lumber which found it's way into the back of the net. Whiteparish then continued to pile on the pressure but failed to make it count on a number of occasions. Figheldean then took there opportunity and scored from a set piece. However Whiteparish replied instantly with a smart tap-in from Daniel Burchmore. After the break Whiteparish continued to dominate with notible performances from Craig Wallington,Tim Mundy, David 'Goal a Game' Stacey, Joe Hope and in form Daniel Barnes. Local Hero David Stacey took his goal scoring opportunity with clinical precision, thumping the ball into the roof of the net. Whiteparish made a number of second half substitutions with Mundy, O'Donnell and Dear all coming on. Off came Tim Mundy for the last time this season. He was struggling with a groin injury that he had picked up playing for the reserves last Saturday. He walked off the field of dreams with a standing ovation from the 23,000 strong Whiteparish crowd. Asked after the game how he was feeling, Mundy replied 'I'm feeling mixed emotions obviously. I'm deadly disappointed that this is my last performance this season in the Red and White kit, but also i'm excited about meeting my new team mates in Sydney, and that i'd like to give a massive thank you to my team mates!' The fan's are said to concerned with the potential gap in the Whiteparish defence that will be hard to fill following a string of fantastic performaces from the fan's favourite.
Whiteparish 3 - 2 Figheldean
Sunday the 9th of November
Whiteparish continuted their fantastic form this season, by chalking up their seventh successive win. Their lead at the top of the Salisbury and District League was further strengthened by a 3-3 draw between West Harnham and West Tytherley. Much the same as the previous week, Whiteparish were slow to start. A number of the team's starting 11 were seen in the early hours in the morning in the Chapel Night club, this may hold some of the explanation as to why the team were slow to start. None the less Whiteparish soon kicked into gear and opened the scoring through Brendon O'Brien. It was a well worked goal resulting in a clever finish. This was just the start from O'Brien, after being released from Salisbury custody just hours before kick off, he soon started to express himself infront of goal, finishing with a personal tally of 4 goals, the last of which was a 60 yard thunderbolt that flew into the top corner of Winterslows part time goal keeper. Yet again Mr Whiteparish David Stacey came up with the goods after claiming a quick fire hat -trick, this will further inhanse his place in Sean O'Donnell's team. The manager himself suprised the capacity crowd with a stunning goal from the touchline on the left hand side. It was a goal that O'Donnell's idol Barry Ferguson would have been proud of. The rout was finially completed with Tom Mundy scoring his fourth goal of the campaign. Even though he struggled through the game with a serious injury that is set to be with him for the next few weeks, he continuted well through the pain barrier to finish the game and essentially did a job for the team. Yet again the Whitepaish defence of Barnes, Lumber, Evans and Males looked shaky at times. Males let himself down with a ferocious attack on winterslows right back with an uppercut straight to the face downed the young right back and Males was given his marching orders. The Fans of the Red and White Lions and pushing for fresh faces in January, this will heap even more pressure on Barnes and Lumber who's performances have already been put under scrutiny by the new Whiteparish Chairman Sir John Stacey. Barnes was lucky enough to start the game after Tim Mundy was injured whilst playing for the reserve team on Saturday. Sad news again as the red and white's star striker Craig Wallington was not involved in the fixture due to an extention in his rehabilitation. Craig is said to be struggling with this new dose of rehab and is reportably weeks away from a return.
Whiteparish 9 - 0 Winterslow
Sunday the 2nd of November
Another Fantastic result for The Lions with their 6th successive win which extends their lead at the top of the Salisbury and District League (Sunday) to 5 points clear.Whiteparish started off slowly, conceding a goal within the first 10 minutes. However words of encouragement from Captain and local hero David 'Goal a Game' Stacey, soon helped whiteparish to dominate the game. The Lions started to play their free flowing style of football and got their reward with a goal just before half time from their prolific striker Craig Wallington. Both teams went into the half time break at 1-1. Whiteparish stated the stronger of the teams and soon stretched their advantage to a 2-1 lead with a fiercely driven free kick from David Stacey. "That's how you do it boy's". Later in the game Whiteparish had another corner which was whipped in by ladies man Robert Males, it was met by a towering header by Angus Evans with his first goal of the season which extended the Red and White Army's lead to 3-1. The Whiteparish Lions took this opportunity to rest some of their more influential players. Off came Tom Mundy for the gaffer Sean. Another substitution was Whiteparish's newest signing Joe Hope, who was replaced by Daniel Barnes. Daniel has found it hard to secure a first team spot this season but his 25minutes of trickery, speed and all round desire for the game will send a strong message to the selection committee before next sunday's game.
Final Score: Whiteparish FC 3 - 1 The Ale House
